


Hidden Memories

by MonacaTogami



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: 2P America (Hetalia), 2P England (Hetalia), 2P Hetalia, Alternate Universe - Future, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Human, Best Friends, Childhood Memories, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Memories, Pain, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Repressed Memories, Scars, Secrets, Teenagers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-14
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:55:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24338488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MonacaTogami/pseuds/MonacaTogami
Summary: New "mind entering" technology developed by Japan has piqued the interest of five teenagers. They decide to go into Oliver's mind, only to find that things aren't as happy in there as it might seem.
Relationships: 2P America/Canada, 2P England/America, Unrequited England/2P England
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20





	1. Chapter 1

The navy blue minivan was buzzing with excitement as it drove along the road, kicking up leaves that blew in the wind behind it as it sped along.

Inside the vehicle was a group of friends, all having recently been at school the day prior, and all excited for the new experience that this one autumn Saturday was sure to hold.

"Dudes, this is gonna be so cool!" exclaimed Alfred F. Jones, straight A student, student council member, and leader of the Varsity football team - basically the perfect son, student, and boyfriend. Next to him sat Oliver Kirkland, a somewhat shy and bubbly young man who was the leader of the cooking club, and first chair violin in the school orchestra, not to mention Alfred's boyfriend going on three years.

"You think everything is going to be cool," said a tan American as he rolled his ruby red eyes from the passenger seat. Allen Jones was quite the lone wolf - that is, until he ran into a certain Canadian that introduced him to his brother and friend group, a group that the guitarist soon became a part of. The Canadian in question, Matthew, was seated behind Allen with a hand on the tan male's shoulder. Matthew was somewhat shy and quiet, but was outgoing enough to earn himself the position of Student Council President, a title he wore with the utmost pride and honour. And, a title which helped him in getting his brother, Alfred, onto the student council when the blue-eyed American practically begged him to. 'I need it for college resumes!' he had pleaded, a plea that gave Matthew enough reason to oblige.

In the driver's seat was Arthur Kirkland, who was attempting to tune out the noise of the others around him as to focus on the road. He would have preferred not to drive, but being that he was the only one with a license (except for Oliver, but there was no way he was letting that speed demon drive his car) it wasn't really an option for the Brit.

Leader of the debate team and the occult club, Arthur was a bit of a temperamental and mysterious character. That hadn't stopped him from meeting Oliver, however - the two had met mostly because both of their families were from England. They had known each other since third grade. The two Brits were sort of the 'original' members of the friend group. Or, it at least felt that way to Arthur.

"Don't you two get into an argument now," Matthew said with a chuckle, leaning forward and resting his blonde head on Allen's shoulder. "Don't worry doll," the tan male responded, placing a soft kiss on Matthew's forehead.

"Think of it though, guys! We can go into someone's mind! Isn't that just amazing? How come you guys don't seem as excited as me?" Alfred said, cocking an eyebrow at the others.

"I am excited, you twit, I'm just not as hyper as you are. But, that does remind me, we need to choose whose mind we are going to go into." Arthur pursed his lips after he spoke and turned a sharp corner.

"Well obviously I say Ollie, I mean the guy's probably got the cleanest brain of any of us," Allen suggested.

Oliver, who had been oddly silent this whole time, and was cuddled against Alfred's arm, and his eyes stared in front of him, showing that he was clearly lost in thought. It was only when his name came up in the conversation did he snap back into reality. "What?"

"I agree with Allen, Ollie's probably the safest way to go since this is our first time doing this," Matthew said, his finger to his chin as he thought about the situation.

"I don't know if I want you all in my head…" Oliver said softly, squeezing Alfred's arm like a life support as he looked down at the floorboard of the car. He wasn't too fond of the idea that his friends could be snooping around in all of his memories.

"C'mon, Oliver. What's so bad about this? We're just looking at your memories, you've probably told me about most of them anyway," Arthur said, trying to reason with the Brit.

The pink-haired boy closed his eyes, "I just don't feel comfortable with it…"

Alfred looked down at the Brit, giving him a reassuring smile that was brighter than the sun. "Olliepop, you don't have to do it if you don't want to," he told him reassuringly, turning back to the group and saying, "I volunteer to do it."

Allen burst out laughing. "No way I'm going in your head, burger brains! There's probably some freaky shit in there!" he exclaimed, causing Matthew to flick him on the cheek. "Don't be so rude, Allen," the Canadian said sternly, to which Allen muttered a soft "Sorry…"

Oliver thought about it for the moment. He didn't want Alfred to be subjected to that. To have all of his secrets found out - Arthur and Allen would ridicule him. It was exactly what he was afraid of.

Oliver took a deep breath. "No, no, love… I-" he paused for a moment, contemplating the words that were about to escape his lips. "I'll do it…"

Alfred raised an eyebrow. "You sure?" he asked, a bit confused at Oliver's sudden change of heart. In return, the English boy nodded, giving a small smile of reassurance. "Alright…" Alfred said.

"Sweet! So since that's all figured out and stuff," Allen exclaimed, "now comes the question, are we there yet?" He chuckled after the words left his lips, giving Arthur a sly grin.

"We'll be there in ten minutes, idiot," Arthur grumbled in response, resisting the urge to strangle the American, lest he take his eyes off of the road and they end up crashing into a ditch.

Just as Arthur said, in ten minutes, they were there. The Brit had stopped the car at the large ornate gateway and showed his ticket to the lady at the booth, who in turn opened up the gates and allowed Arthur to pull through.

They drove through a small road of large cone shaped bushes, until reaching a parking lot at the front of a large, grey building. It looked a little intimidating, with an almost castle like style of architecture-small towers, ornate designs, and a large oak door.

Arthur parked the car. Everyone unbuckled their seatbelts and stepped out, looking around with curiosity. Oliver felt a bit intimidated by the building, and latched onto Alfred like a life support. Allen and Matthew, however, held hands as they fast approached the doors, excited to see the inside. Arthur crossed his arms and rolled his eyes at everyone else, waiting for Alfred and Oliver to follow the other two before following after them.

Matthew and Allen entered, quickly going up to the lady at the front desk that was in the centre of the hotel lobby-like room. It was large and echoed, with an ornate tiled floor and elegant looking couches that sat to the far left. There was an entrance to a long hallway beside the front desk, that seemed to go on forever with many doors and rooms.

"Appointment for Williams," Matthew said to the lady, who in turn went to check her computer, before turning back to the Canadian. "Alright sir, you all may wait here, Doctor Honda will be with you shortly," she said with a smile.

Matthew smiled back softly. "Thank you," he said, grabbing Allen's arm and guiding him over to a couch. They sat down, the other three in the group following suit.

Arthur asked, "Did she say how long it would be?"

Matthew shook his head. "No, she said it would just be a moment."

Arthur nodded, leaning back and crossing his legs. "Well let's hope it isn't too long."

Oliver seemed very nervous as they waited. He squirmed uncomfortably in his seat, attached to Alfred and definitely not letting go any time soon. Alfred seemed to notice this, his face contorting in concern.

"Ollie? Are you sure you're okay with doing this? You don't have to if you're uncomfortable."

"Yes, I'm fine with it… just a little nervous. But who wouldn't be?"

"Alright, but remember: you can tell me if you don't want to do this."

Oliver smiled softly, laying his head on Alfred's chest. "Thank you, Alfie. But really, I'm fine. Would I lie to you?"

Alfred sighed ever so slightly, nuzzling the top of the Brit's head with his chin. "No, at least I don't think so. But I know that you do things you don't want to do to make other people happy."

Cutting off their small conversation was the entrance of a small Japanese man, wearing a white lab coat over a black suit. "Hello. Please follow me," the man said. The group stood up and did so, the five assuming that this man could be none other than the Doctor Honda that was going to provide them with the means to enter Oliver's mind.

Doctor Honda led them into the long hallway, stopping shortly to enter a large white room. Inside the room were four chairs and a large metal table, as well as a black stool with wheels that was likely where Doctor Honda usually sat. There were also many complicated looking machines, with many wires and buttons, that made it look like it was straight out of a sci-fi film.

The Japanese male turned to face the five teenagers, looking at them with an almost nonexistent smile. "Whose mind are you all entering today?" he asked.

Allen and Alfred both pointed to Oliver, Arthur rolling his eyes and Matthew chuckling. Oliver raised his hand up shyly. "Me," he said softly.

"Alright. If you could kindly sit here," Doctor Honda instructed, gesturing to the metal table. "Everyone else may take a seat in one of the chairs."

They all followed the doctor's instructions, Oliver laying down a bit nervously, mentally trying to brush his worries away. Doctor Honda sat down in his stool, pulling out a clipboard and scribbling a few things down. He then rolled over to the table where Oliver was laying, and began to wipe Oliver's face, and then attach electrodes to each side of Oliver's head, and the centre of his forehead.

"So, I believe we haven't properly been introduced. I'm Doctor Kiku Honda," he said as he worked.

"I'm Alfred! And the man you're doing all that weird stuff on is my cute boyfriend, Oliver," Alfred piped up, getting out of his chair as he spoke before immediately sitting back down. "And that's Allen, that's Matthew, and that's Arthur," he added, pointing to each of his friends as he said their names.

"We can introduce ourselves, you git," Arthur muttered quietly, crossing his arms and looking at the white tile floor.

"It's a pleasure to meet you all," Doctor Honda said, stifling a small chuckle. He didn't seem to notice Oliver's discomfort.

After Doctor Honda finished with Oliver, he took electrodes that ran from a small box under the metal table, that was also connected to the electrodes in Oliver's mind, and brought them over to each of the other four. He then connected them all to each of their heads, in a similar manner to Oliver, except without the electrode in the middle of the forehead. He then handed them each a button which was also connected to the box, before standing up and walking over to a button on the wall.

"When I press this button, Oliver is going to go under. When you are ready, press the button in your hand and you will be put into a dream like state, where your consciousness is in his mind, but your bodies look like you are asleep here in the real world," he explained, the teens nodding in tandem, except for Oliver, who simply closed his eyes and waited.

"Don't worry, this process is completely safe," Doctor Honda reassured, before pressing the button.

Oliver's eyes shot open, his eyes going wide, his pupils dilating, and his whole body tightening up, before everything relaxed and his eyes gently shut. He was limp, and looked like he was peacefully asleep.

Alfred tugged on the collar of his shirt nervously, and looked at the other three. "You guys ready?" he asked, his voice cracking a bit in nervousness.

"Ready as I'll ever be," Allen said, Matthew nodding.

"Alright, on the count of three," Arthur said. "One… two… three!" They all pressed the small button, their bodies falling limp in their chairs.

The group opened their eyes and looked around themselves curiously. Where one might think they would be in a crazy colour-filled wonderland, or floating in an endless black void, a different sight was given to them. The four were standing in what appeared to be a small grey room. In front of them were three office-like doors. The first was labeled 'Memories,' the second labeled 'Dreams,' and the last labeled 'Subconscious,' with a small sign under it that read 'KEEP OUT'.

"Well this certainly isn't what I was expecting," Alfred commented, walking toward the first door and examining it carefully.

"Yes, I was expecting some crazy sugar-high type dreamland, like a Candy Land board," Arthur agreed, taking a step and listening to the echo. "Definitely not something this... grey."

Allen walked up to the last door and gave it a knock. "Wonder why this one says 'keep out'," he said, putting his ear to the door for a moment.

"Well obviously it's because you're not supposed to go in there, idiot," Arthur responded, rolling his emerald eyes and crossing his arms - his usual response to anything he deemed to be 'utterly stupid.'

"Yeah I get that," Allen muttered and quickly shot a glare at the Brit. Matthew grabbed Allen's arm in a somewhat comforting manner, but also in a sort of silent plea, saying, "No bickering you two. Now, how about we start with memories first?"

Arthur and Allen both nodded in agreement, looking toward Alfred who was currently in front of the door they needed to go through. Alfred looked at them and then the door, hesitantly moving his hand to the knob. "Are you guys sure we should do this? I mean, this is private info and... it took a lot of convincing to get Ollie to do this..."

Arthur walked toward the door, shoving Alfred out of the way and placing his hand on the knob. "Nonsense. I grew up with him - there's probably nothing in here I don't already know. Not to mention we're likely going to start with his childhood anyway. What could be so bad about that?"

He swiftly opened the door and stepped inside, holding it open for the others, who followed suit. They were now in a much larger room - one that seemed to go on forever - which had a large assortment of file cabinets. "Interesting," Arthur muttered, stepping forward and noticing that the first cabinet was labeled "3-6", numbers that the Brit assumed to be age - and a part of Oliver's life that he had never seen before.

"I guess this is where we begin," he said. His hand reached forward and gripped the handle of the cabinet. Flinging it open, he peered inside, only to find himself getting pulled into the black-hole-like drawer. "Woah-!" he exclaimed, and as if like an echo, so did the other three.

After a mere few seconds, the group were in a theatre like area. They looked at each other, and then looked around, before seating themselves in the middle. They looked up at the screen, which was like any other cinema screen, except for the fact that it was curved slightly - to resemble human vision, no doubt.

Before they could think to say anything, the 'film' started. The screen went white for a moment, before displaying a house - a house that the four had never seen before. Everything around the house was moving quickly, and the 'camera' which was likely a three-year-old Oliver's eyes shook rapidly.

From what could be scene, the house seemed to be rather simple; medium sized - maybe a tad larger - with white walls that were decorated with an assortment of paintings and photographs. Oliver was most definitely running, almost bumping into brown tables, golden lamps, and green vases.

"So this is Oliver's first memory? Seems a little high-energy for that," Allen commented, his eyes glued to the screen; one arm resting over Matthew's shoulders and the other on the arm rest; his mouth agape only slightly.

"No, I don't think it's his first. I think this only shows us core memories - the most important ones. So this would be his first core memory," Arthur responded, his eyes glued to the screen in a similar fashion to Allen's and his arms crossed over his chest as usual.

"I wonder what's important about him running around," chimed Alfred, his elbow leaning on the arm rest as he shifted his head to rest on his hand, his ocean blue eyes stuck to the screen like both Allen and Arthur, like a fly caught in a spider's web.

"Maybe the important part isn't that he's running, but what he's running to," reasoned Matthew, who seemed to be as enthralled as everyone else.

As if on cue the video slowed down and tilted upward, showing a white door that looked huge, given that it was from the perspective of a three-year-old that was no more than two feet tall.

The eyes of young Oliver stared intently at the doorknob, which jiggled, the sound of key tinkling coming from the other side.

Alfred sat on the edge of his seat, wondering who would step out from the other side of the door.

The door swung open, revealing a tall man in a British naval uniform. He had pink hair and blue eyes, just like Oliver's.

"Daddy!" exclaimed Oliver's small, squeaky, three-year-old voice, causing a collective gasp to form from the crowd that was watching the memory.

"Daddy? I thought Oliver's dad left him when he was born?" Alfred said, utter confusion in his voice. "I did too…" Arthur responded, just as confused as the American.

"Well he must've been lying," Allen commented, crossing his arms.

"What reason would he have to lie?" pondered Matthew.

"I'm not sure… let's just keep watching. There has to be a reason," Alfred said, leaning his head in his hands, his elbows resting on the armrests of the cinema seat he was in.

"Hey, sport!" the man (who was now known to the group to be Oliver's father) said, and scooped Oliver up in his arms, the camera going black for a moment as Oliver blinked his eyes. Happy giggles escaped the small Brit's lips at all times, chuckles from his father soon joining in.

"How's my favourite son doing?" the father asked, Oliver responding with, "Spwenderific! Mummy made cookies!"

"Well that explains why he's so hyper," Allen said with a small chuckle.

"Did she now? Did you save a cookie for Daddy?" Oliver's father asked the small boy. The British child nodded. "Mhm!" he exclaimed, pointing toward the kitchen. The man carried him into the room, revealing a ginger woman with blue eyes, who was wearing a yellow sundress. She turned around and looked at the two. "Well look who's home!" the English woman exclaimed.

She gave the man a kiss, before the man carried Oliver over to the table and sat him down in a seat with a booster. He then sat down across from him, a plate of cookies in between them both.

Oliver grabbed a cookie and quickly devoured it, while his father grabbed one and took a small bite. "These are delicious. Mummy always makes the best cookies," he said.

The woman smiled towards him, her face bright and happy. "Thank you dear," she said sweetly.

Arthur watched the scene with surprise and confusion. "Odd…"

"What is it Arthur? Is that not Ollie's mom or something?" Alfred quickly asked.

"No, no, that's Oliver's mum. But the few times I met her, I just don't remember her being that… happy," the Englishman responded.

"Maybe she was just in a bad mood 'cause she was in the same room as you," Allen joked, earning an elbow to the ribs from Matthew. He pouted, Matthew giving him a coy smile.

The screen soon faded to black, signalling that the memory was over.

"Onto the next one I guess," Alfred said, looking at the others before watching the screen as it brightened up again, to reveal a playground with a red slide and brown poles. The image quickly went up and down, and those same excited giggles from before could be heard, along with the occasional, "Higher! Higher!" It was obvious that Oliver was on a swing.

"Make sure your putting your legs out!" exclaimed the similar voice of the father. "This isn't so hard for your first time, huh?"

The camera shook left to right, likely from Oliver shaking his head. "Nope! Swinging is easy! Super fun!"

Collective "awe"s could be heard from the four watching as they admired the happy memory. But just as quickly as it had come, it disappeared.

"That one was quick," Matthew commented. His violet eyes examined the now black screen, intently waiting for the next memory to appear. It was only when the blackness never left, did he start to grow concerned.

"What's happening?" Matthew and Alfred asked at the same time, staring at each other for a moment, figuring it to be a twin thing, and then shaking their heads.

"I don't know. Maybe it's an error in the system," Arthur suggested, "It's not completely flawless, after all."

"Wait guys, look." Allen pointed toward the screen, a mildly shocked look in his ruby red eyes.

"What-?" Alfred's mouth was left agape as he stared at the screen.

"Oh my God-"


	2. Chapter 2

“That’s the biggest bouncy castle I’ve ever seen!” Alfred exclaimed, his eyes seeming to sparkle with childlike whimsy. He was a child at heart, of course. Plus, he hadn’t seen a bouncy house since he was ten. 

“I know right? I didn’t even know they could get that big!” Allen said, a similar glimmer in his eyes. Normally him and Alfred disagreed on more childlike matters, but like the other American, Allen hadn’t seen a bounce house since his childhood. 

“You guys do realise we’re seeing this from a toddler’s perspective, right? It probably just looks that big because of the perspective, idiots,” Arthur chimed in, disappointed in the two Americans for acting like children over something so stupid. Arthur wasn’t fond of bounce houses as a child. He always got sick in them and threw up, so seeing one and thinking about them wasn’t the most pleasant experience for the Brit. 

“Leave it to Artie to ruin the fun,” Alfred said snidely, rolling his ocean blue eyes, “You’re such a party pooper, dude.”

Arthur huffed, “I am not!” and he shot the American a harsh glare. 

Alfred ignored him and continued watching the memory. It was of Oliver’s birthday, most likely his fourth. There were blue, pink, and purple balloons, and a large red velvet cake with a candle shaped like the number four on top. The party appeared to be out in a field or meadow, although the lack of trees and buildings could have just been from Oliver’s perspective. It seemed fun, although the memory soon faded away like the others. 

“These are kind of boring,” Allen said, slumping down in his chair a little, as the screen soon lit up again. Sure, the bounce castle was cool and all, but not enough to keep the tan male entertained for long. Although not much could. 

“I think they’re sweet,” Matthew disagreed, “it’s nice to see he had a good childhood.” The Canadian smiled softly, leaning into Allen’s shoulder. 

Everyone was quiet again as a scene that was much different than the others began to unfold before their eyes. 

It was dark, and from their point of view they could barely see a thing. They could hear movement though, and small Oliver’s uneasy-sounding breathing, so it was likely he was walking somewhere. Suddenly, a dim light from a staticy TV screen cast upon young Oliver’s living room, the creak of a door being heard. The camera slowly turned to face Oliver’s dad, who was asleep in a recliner. Well, passed out more like it.

“D-Daddy?” Oliver’s meek voice spoke, as he poked the side of the larger man’s sleeping form. 

The man shot awake, his eyes looking around, before focusing directly on Oliver. He breathed harshly, and let out a grunt, almost like a beast. 

“Whaddya want?” the clearly drunken man spoke. His words were slurred and it was hard to make out what he was saying, especially for Alfred who had a hard time with accents in the first place. 

“I uhm, I-I had a nightmare,” Oliver stuttered quietly. The camera shook a little, likely as Oliver did.

“You both’d me ‘cause of a damn dream?” Oliver’s father snarled, causing the small boy to take a wary step back. 

“I-I’m sorry, D-Daddy,” Oliver whimpered. 

“Don’ ever bug me when I’m sleepin’ again!” the man shouted, back-handing little Oliver across the face, causing him to stumble to the ground. Oliver tried to look back up at his father, but another blow was laid across his face. He cried and whimpered, evidently holding in screams.

Arthur felt like he could almost taste the blood that Oliver was surely tasting.

Alfred finally understood why Oliver always got nervous when Alfred would raise his fist in the air after a victory. 

The screen went black again. It stayed that way for an uncomfortable amount of time. The four stared at it in shock. It was hard for each of them to process that this had happened to toddler Oliver, and that he had never told any of them about it. 

After a silence that felt like forever, Matthew unsteadily spoke up, his voice shaky. 

“I guess I spoke too soon…” he muttered. 

“Yeah, me too,” Allen added. He felt Matthew squeeze his arm and looked over at the Canadian. He was quite obviously shaken up. However, not nearly as shaken up as Alfred and Arthur were. That was clear just by taking one look at them.

Alfred’s hands were gripping the arm rests of his chair tightly, his teeth bared harshly down on his bottom lip. His blue eyes were open wide, and he was pale as a ghost. Arthur, on the other hand, was just as pale as Alfred, but his face was furrowed in a harsh frown. His body was practically shaking with anger, and he looked like he was about to explode. 

“That… bastard…!” Arthur spoke through gritted teeth, his hands clenching into tight fists. 

The curved screen continued to show nothing. 

“I-I-I… I can’t believe…this must have just been a… a one time thing… right…?” Alfred stuttered, not wanting to believe that this could have ever happened again. No, then surely Oliver would have told him, right?

“If it was a one time thing,” Matthew said, his voice soft and unsteady, “it wouldn’t be in his core memories, right?”

Alfred gulped. Matthew made a good point. But he still couldn’t believe that to be true. 

“Hey guys, I hate to sound insensitive,” Allen cut in, “but shouldn’t the next memory have started already?” He gestured to the screen that he knew everyone’s eyes were fixated on, but that he also knew they weren’t paying attention to. 

As soon as they all realised what Allen was referring to, no one had time to comment. They all began to be seemingly sucked out of the room. It didn’t hurt, although as Alfred would later remark, ‘It feels like I’m a freaking Stretch Armstrong or something!’

“What’s going on?!” Alfred shouted. He looked around in panic, watching as his arms and legs faded into weird streams. 

“I guess the movie’s over,” Allen said. He didn’t seem too affected by what was happening. 

“Over? But we only got to age four! There’s still two more years, dammit!” Arthur yelled. He wanted to know the name of Oliver’s father. He wanted to know just how much he had done. And most of all, he wanted to know if he was dead, or if he’d have to kill the bastard himself. 

In the blink of an eye, they were back in that endless file room. None of them knew exactly what to make of what just happened, but they knew it wasn’t supposed to, as evidenced by the flashing words above them which read “ERROR: REP”.

Allen chose the most logical thing to ask in this situation. 

“What the fuck does REP mean?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know the whole bouncy house thing at the beginning was weird, but trust me it'll make more sense later on! :)


End file.
